Heckler that didn’t make it

26/9/2007


Heckler that didn’t make it


I wrote this for the Sydney Morning Herald's Heckler (in other words rant) section. It would seem they didn't think it was worth publishing, so here it is!

HECKLER THAT DIDN'T MAKE IT - I HATE PRE-PAID BUSES

Well I am going to take all my money and get a nice bonfire rocking tonight. Why not?
It would appear that legal tender is essentially useless these days unless it is electronically transferred onto a card, sticker or ticket of some sort.

Take this scenario that I was confronted with yesterday. I was attempting to catch a bus to uni from Anzac Parade to Central. Usually this is no sweat, other than fighting with UNSW students for a seat. Well how quickly things change in 2007. As the bus approached I and a few others noticed a big yellow sign adorning the front of the bus.
"PRE PAID ONLY – NO TICKETS SOLD ON THIS BUS" it read.

Surely not? Surely this was just a guideline that the drivers don't stick to we commented.
Well we were wrong.

"No tickets, wait for the next bus!" shouted the bus driver. So at least a dozen of us apparent dinosaurs who still use "money" were denied entry to a half-empty bus.

So we waited.

Then appeared another bus – same story, yes you guessed it "PRE PAID ONLY – NO TICKETS SOLD ON THIS BUS". Same story from the driver too "Wait for the next bus!"

The line of rejects brandishing legal tender had now swelled to at least 20. A few people starting hailing cabs while complaining to smiling cab drivers about the bus situation.
One pack of lucky pack of SOBs jammed into a passing mate's car, looking back at us stranded donkeys with a mixture of sympathy and scorn.

Patience was rapidly declining and once the fourth prepaid only bus appeared, my patience ran out completely – as did my time to get to uni. I hailed down the next cab.

The cab driver was attempting to be sympathetic, while I could see the dollar signs subconsciously ticking over in his head at the thought of more fares on the Eastern Suburbs route from now on. Who could blame him, in fact I was glad he got my money yesterday instead of 'Sydney Buses'.

Maybe I am a little behind the times, but I thought in these times of global warming we were being encouraged to catch public transport? Am I wrong? Did I get it the wrong way around? Surely I must be confused, because it would appear that 'Sydney Buses' are attempting to make it more complicated for your average person to catch public transport.

Well if you are interested in joining my currency bonfire, feel free to rock up. Just bring your useless collection of notes and let those babies burn. Bring those pesky coins along too, we can work an adequate melting procedure for them, because as I found out yesterday – they are definitely useless. Should be a good night, oh I should mention there is an entry fee to my place for this special event and I would like to make it absolutely clear before you rock up at my door:

PRE-PAID ONLY, NO TICKETS SOLD TONIGHT.